Saturday, February 27, 2010

The Clouds

To everybody was following, or follows this blog, it has been retired. There is a link to my new, full-time project on the title, The Clouds. I update daily, and if you find any of the things I've mentioned here interesting, please, check it out, and share your opinions

See you there.


Saturday, October 10, 2009

First Train Home

Well, this last week has been an odd one. Fantastic highs, and laughably pitiful lows come together to make something that's memorable, but tiring beyond belief. Nothing I can't handle, but it just makes the whole idea of "When it rains, it pours" hit very close to home.

What I mean when I say that is, things don't happen a little bit at a time. Walls and rules have been formed over years upon years, and it takes a while to gather the momentum to breath through them without hurting anyone. Once you get moving though, you don't find you want to stop after getting past the first barrier... after all, after all of that effort, why stop, only to try to get the speed back up later? So you keep going and going, until you realize that your farther away from your starting point that what you ever thought you could get. Everything that you've rushed past is gone, and what's in front of you is something that you now know you posses the ability to bypass, but you still unsure if your really ready to get past it.

On a related note, is there a more powerful force than love? The jealousy, the heartache and the madness one girl can drive someone to is matched only by the joy, the life, the loss of sleep and the dreams that can be instilled in the same soul in but a second. To have your sanity ripped away with you, and exchanged with nothing but clouds, full of sunshine and storms. I can't help but smile every time I so much as think about her.

That's about all I've got to say for this week. Don't know when I'll write again, but it shouldn't be too long

All shadows have to have a light to be created.

Saturday, October 3, 2009

I, Megaphone

Hey there. Some two and a half months later, here I am. Alive and well as ever. Life is still amazing, love is still amazing. Summer is quickly changing into Autumn here. Looking out the window the skies are gray, and the leaves on the trees are burning brightly, glistening with the frigid October rain. The nights aren't quite freezing, but the cold leaves a crispness in your lungs and a silver frost on the windows.

Life is beautiful, and love is amazing. Between dancing with disaster, trying to earn everything you've been given by the world around you, and finding time to step back and take in the smell of the rain, sometimes there's not a lot of room for "you". Guess what I've learned? "You" is in all of this. You're never without your own intuition and soul. From President to Punk, we all have an undying spirit inside of. No job, no life, and no affilation can strip us of who and what we are.

Drowning in life, and in the undying spirit of humanity. I'm Chris, this is Thingsleftunsaid, the ramblings of a madman, and I'm back.

Deep breath, open your eyes, and see what the world is.

Monday, July 13, 2009

All of a Sudden, I Miss Everyone

So... It's happened a third time. That game has sunk it's claws into me again, and once again I find myself not only not fighting back, but accepting it's pull. Ladies and gentlemen, I speak of nothing more than the Korean MMORPG of Maplestory.

Twice before I've played this game, and leveled characters to the low twenties, but somehow life always manages to divert me from the game after I log around a day worth of playtime... but, it's summer, and I don't have a lot going on in my life... with nothing to distract me, I don't know how long this will go on for, and the longer it goes on for, the more attached I get to my avatar, and the harder it is to cut the ties.

Anyways, the other item on my writing agenda besides my latest addiction is a simple concept most of us hardly think about: Texting. Yes, it's convinient, yes, it's novel and sometimes... yes, it is very practical to be able to connect with your loved ones without really disrupting them, or yourself. It leaves me with just one question though: What happens to isolation? For one to be truly alone requires that communication be cut for either the sender or recipiant, but what if that communication is always there? On some level, is this an end to helplessness and desolation, and is that really a good thing? Just food for thought I suppose. I'm not exactly certain of what my thoughts on the matter are. Contemplate it, I suppose.

Well, I need to return to life now... maybe get some breakfast.
Never give up- every problem has a solution, but sometimes rules need to be broken.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Baka Neku, Neku Basu

So, life's better than it was last post. I'm past the sadness and the hurt that came to transpire a week ago. It's still tender, but it's done, and it's a moot issue to worry about, so I'm trying not to (which is kind of a big deal for me).
Anyways, leaving the past in the past, what's been happening for me lately is a blast. For starters, last night I had a Hayao Miyazaki marathon with my girlfriend and her brother. (Over the course of six-ish hours we watched Princess Mononoke, My Neighbor Totoro, and Spirited Away) It's kind of interesting to think about the movies though. They're all from the same director, and the exact same animation studio, but entirely different genres of movie, ranging from a feudal war between gods and man, to a journey of the imagination of two small children.
Getting back on topic, it really was a great night. I learned a few things about the dynamics of the relationship of a certain brother and sister, and the trust and... dare I say, love going on between two siblings. It really put things in perspective for me, because although I am close to my own brother, it's different because we're the same gender, and my own sisters are much younger than me. In their case though it's a sort of (for lack of better term) loyal friendship. They bicker from time to time, but they look out for one another, in a most unconventional manner. In a weird sort of way, it's refreshing, and flat-out heartwarming to see this kind of bond between two people. On a related note though, I fear I may have lost some of my reputation with her brother due to the transpiration of certain events, and my taste in films.
Well, that's all I've got for this Friday... I need to go now, life is calling me

I fight like you want to fight
I love like you want to love
I'm smart, capable, but most of all I'm free in all the ways you'll never be.

-Chaotic Neutral

P.S. To a certain someone
I apologize for not being able to take certain matters into my own hands recently, and I appriciate you... helping me out. Honestly, I've never had a better time learning to be myself in my life.

Monday, June 29, 2009

The Knife Going In.

I screwed up. I screwed up badly, and I don't think that I'll be able to fix it. At best, this situation will be a messy one, and I'll come out of it with all sorts of unsightly bruises and scars. At worst... well, suffice it to say, I might learn how just much pain I can handle. If that happens, it'll take a hell of a lot more than a few days in bed and a lot of fluids to heal me.
Deep breath.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

The Bends

That last post was bad, and I apologize to whoever read it, and I thank those of you who did read it and are still for coming back for more.
I'm going to keep this post much briefer than the last, because I'm running on very few hours of sleep, and it's getting pretty late.
Well, I found out about an interesting deal an acquaintance of mine has with her father: If she doesn't kiss a boy until her 19th birthday (she's currently 16), he will reward her a sum of $10,000. To be frank, I think this is puerile. The way I see it, a father is bribing his daughter because he's scared of what she might do, and this isn't something one can put a price tag on. To me, it feels like he's robbing her of one of the greatest parts of being young; romance and unmitigated passion. To know that feeling for even a single instant is worth more than all of the wealth in the world, and this poor girl is being cheated of it. I suppose I shouldn't be so upset with this, but... ugh, I don't know why I feel so strongly on this matter. I just do. I mean... speaking strictly logically, a single kiss means nothing, it's just a matter of feeling. Of sharing. Of the sweet seduction of a summers night, and knowing that being held in that certain someones arms, you're not alone.
Anyways, that's all I've got to say. I'd appreciate any comments concerning other people's thoughts on the matter

You're a part time lover and a full time friend
The monkey on your back is the latest trend
I don't see what anyone could see in anyone else
But you

Monday, June 8, 2009

Comfort Eagle

Good afternoon, internet. In case any of you still check up on this, or are still following it, this blog is not dead. Not yet anyways. Suffice it to say, I've just been in somewhat of a creative slump, and I haven't had much drive to do anything for the last month or so, but I think I'm better now. Anyways, now that I'm armed with new found lessons, stories and ideas, my goal is to do a super-long post to make up for my absence. The one thing that I want to mention about this post before I begin though is that it's going to be written in a letter format to a friend, whose name I won't disclose. She'll have been sent a link to this, and it'll make up for my hotmail being out of commission.
Hey you
Yeah, I know it's been a while, and as you can see, I'm not replying in a conventional fashion, but I'm way overdue for a blog post, and the way I see it, this is killing two birds with one stone. Anyways, yeah... life has been crazy lately. Going to Portland was an amazing trip. It's really a very pretty city, and because of all of the rainfall, and the temperate environment next to the ocean there's a lot of plant life, which give the city a very nice organic, but still modern feel to it. On that note, however, I want to say something about how ridiculous Americans can be. I honestly got asked why I didn't speak in a Canadian dialect, or if it was snowing at home. Honestly, what is this about? Why do people refuse to educate themselves? Maybe I'm just being a bit impulsive here, but I'm kinda bothered by this. Why on Earth would somebody make ludicrous statements like that with no evidence whatsoever to back it up? People are silly, and I'll leave it at that. I'm pretty sure most will agree with me about this... but if they agree, then why would they do it? But, I'm getting away from what I really want to talk about.. It's somewhat of a waste of effort on my part. All I ask of my readers is to try to observe the world around them, and make their own judgment, free of what their own culture in. And, for the love of God, if you think you've found something worthwhile, share it with the world!
On the note of my music, I've had a ton of intellectual and emotional inspiration for music. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that spring and summer have finally set themselves free, and it's warm and green around her again. Maybe it has something to do with the generally cheerful attitude of the people in my hometown, and small realizations that I have wonderful friends, a loving family and an amazing girlfriend. Then again, it might just be a random creative spell. Whatever works, I guess. Anyways, this would be way better than it is, except that I've had a lot of trouble finding the motivation to pick up my guitar and a notebook and actually figure out something beautiful... oh well, to be fair I have been very busy, and I've been trying to come up with something that reflects myself. Perhaps before too long my latest work will be ready to be unveiled. If so, I'll be sure to post it up here.
Speaking more of music (but not my own) I've discovered a few very unique and talented artists over the past few months. I'm only going to write about one of these groups, for the idea of this being a post about me, and not other bands. The band I want to talk about a little bit would be The Most Serene Republic. This seven-man group has been pretty big on the Canadian indie scene ever since the release of their first EP with A.&C.. Anyways, my discovery of their third album "Population" has definitely revolutionized the way that I look at music and what is capable of musicians. If anyone who is into Canadian indies, or wants to have their views changed up is reading this I strongly suggest you check out this album.
Right now my school is in the middle of finals, which is (as we all know) somewhat of a stressful experience. I chose to not let the stress get to me, but for the last few days that struggle has been becoming harder and harder, due to my own worrying about my grades, and my new job with the RCMP (which I can't elaborate much on). Anyways, this stress has been having somewhat of a noticeable effect on the people around me. Many of my friends and peers have been somewhat irritable lately, and mood swings seem to run rampant in the minds of the people around me... either way, it doesn't matter. Final are over on Wednesday, then I've got nothing at all to worry about.
Well... I feel like there's more that I want to write, but I don't know what to say. I suppose I'll just do another post if anything else really comes to me. The plan that I have for the duration of the summer is that I'm going to try to keep a journal again. If I actually do succeed in this, then I'll try to update this blog more regularly. Perhaps once a week or so. I mean, I have a lot to say, so why not say it?

I can't help it if I think it's funny when you're mad
Tryin' hard not to smile when I feel bad
I'm the kinda guy who laughs at a funeral
Can't understand what I mean? You soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of taking off my shirt


P.S. To that one person: I'm sorry it's taken me so long to get back to you, and I understand that this little tidbit of information is hardly an adequate reply to your plea, but right now it's the best I can do. After finals I'll have the time to write more, but for now, I'm starved for time. This being know, please be certain that I want the same thing that you do, and I miss it just as badly as you.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Beautiful Midnight

Woohoo! I'm on spring break!... Which really isn't as exciting as it sounds. So far, this break hasn't been an exciting one, consisting mainly of me trying to find ways to pass time until the day is over... to be frank, I'm doing this post out of boredom, not actual inspiration. I'm slightly dissapointed with myself for this, I must confess... I mean, it's spring break! I should be partying with friends, going places and doing stuff with my peers, not sitting at home, debating if it'd be worthwhile to take a nap whilst I blog.
Getting off topic, EVERYBODY who is reading this needs to see this. It's extremely motivational. Truly, it says something about us as humans... it's a message we don't hear often, but one that should be.
Well, my brief time mentioned in "Clumsy" as Romeo Montegue is over... in that time though, I kinda got to know the whole Shakespearian experience a bit, and the whole idea and culture behind his writing is really quite amazing. I don't think there's any other author who can capture the entire culture of an entire era as well as he. In a weird way, I feel a little bit like some of the personality of Romeo has been seeping over to me. Over the last little while I've been acting more impulsive that usual on certain issues (one or two of you reading this might know what I'm talking about). It's really strange. I have honestly felt kinda different, and I really don't know what the cause is... I'll give more out on that later.

I feel empty. I can't explain how it feels, or exactly what it is I'm feeling, but emptiness is the best way to describe. It's just... nothing... and for lack of better words from there as well, I hate it. I wish something would happen to make me have some sort of feeling, but life just seems to be at some kind of a halt right now. Maybe it's my pent-up stress about certain issues in my life, maybe it's worrying about people, or being concerned about the future, whatever. It's just... there, and I'm not.

-Falling stars

Saturday, March 28, 2009


Well... I fear to whisper this, but I will anyways: I finally believe that spring is here! Somehow, though, it feels like every time that I work up the confidence to sing this from the rooftops of the darkened city that is the Albertan skies, the fates conspire to obliterate whatever optimistic fantasy of sun I've conjured... but no matter! I have faith that the time is finally nigh!

Anyways, I've been rather busy lately, between schoolwork, relationships, and a new writing project I've been putting a fair deal into (a bit more on that later)... also, as my means of speaking have been showing for the last few weeks, I've been studying "Romeo & Juliet" in English, and I've really been enjoying it. It should also be noted that I've been selected for the part of Romeo, and I've been having a great time with that, and have been trying (though not very hard, albeit) to let the part get to my head. Lets see... Ah! In other academic news, the MHS concert band has been nominated to go to provincials in Red Deer, sometime in May! Hopefully, things will go well, and we'll be able to go, and make a good name for our little town.

However, every silver lining also has it's cloud.
Recently I did something most simple, but equally as inadvisable: Simply put, I missed the last song. My actions hurt the one closest to me, and in the process I did a tiny bit of damage that can't be undone. Yes, I realize that with only the greatest of ease I can do something inverse to what I already have done, but that will just build around a tiny hole. Again, I realize that a repair might make the previously mentioned metaphorical dam stronger than it ever was, but the hole is still there, a tiny pockmark to be ogled at by any passerby's who dare to look a bit more closely than most.

Well... I think that's all I've got for now. In later times, I'll write more about my upcoming literary project, and I'll try to keep in touch more

The mother is getting getting confused, lost in the supermarket, and on the way home, we go dancing in the fountain. It always seems like a good idea, and that's because it is a good idea. We're just like... the first man in the state of nature. We're invalid, we're ignorant, and we're stupid, but above all we're happy
It's you, it's me, and it's dancing

And of all the things you thought you knew
-Chris Gast